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20 Reasons I Shouldn’t Like Him , But Do Anyway

April 8, 2010

I have a long history of dating guys that I probably have no business dating. I mean dont get me wrong, I have dated some awesome guys, but I have had my share of total dickheads. So recently I have been thinking about the reasons I may constantly be attracted to the wrong kinds of men.  I started really thinking about the last man I dated and the good and bad things about him and this is what I came up with 🙂

1. You seem very  intimidating to people who don’t know you.
This makes some women  disinclined to flirt with you, thus minimizing my competition.


2. You pee on plants. In fact, you pee on a great many places that are not the toilet and do so with a complete and total lack of modesty.
At least you are mostly house-trained, as you do not usually pee on carpets, or in bed.

3.Ex-girlfriends and other such women call you with implied or expressed offers to perform/receive sexual favors.
Yes, but who are you in bed with when they call? Ha-ha, bitches!

4. You make spur-of-the-moment decisions to commit pranks of questionable legal and moral integrity.
Spontaneity adds excitement to life.

5. Women are constantly vying for your attention.
At the end of the day, you are going home with me. I repeat: ha-ha, bitches!

6. Women are constantly vying for your attention (this happens a lot, hence the repetition).
You will do anything for a deserving woman. Females instinctively sense this. I can’t fault them for recognizing my good fortune.

7. You get really drunk, quite often.
I get laid. Plus, in your inebriated state you can go for hours.

8. Really drunk.
I can ply you with questions about all the things you won’t tell me sober.

9. Really, really, drunk.
Well, it’s better than other things you could choose to use as an emotional salve for your past transgressions.

10. You warned me in advance that you are an asshole, thinking this excuses you from asinine behavior since it is my own fault if I hang out with an admitted asshole.
You don’t try to hide who you are.

11.You unashamedly tell me stories of past incidences involving gross bodily functions.
I work very hard to forget these stories. Ignorance is bliss.

12. If I look fat or  crazy in something , you will tell me.
But if I look gorgeous, you will also tell me. And I can believe you, since you feel no societal obligation to pander to my ego.

13. You are a conceited, egomaniacal, and think you are a sex god.
You are multitalented, attractive, and fantastic in bed.

14. You would never vote for a woman president.
If I wanted to be president, you wouldn’t try and stop me (though you still wouldn’t vote for me).

15. You dislike commitments and similar obligations.

But your very dislike indicates that you take them seriously, and once made, you will never renege on your commitment.

16. You are a “connoisseur of women”.
How do I not benefit from your many years of practice?

17. You have some amazingly misguided thought processes at times.
You are an original thinker.

18. You must be in control of all things at all times.
Said control being demonstrated with blatant displays of chivalry.

19. I think you like making women cry.
Sometimes I like to cry, and have a hard time doing so without inspiration.

20. You talk about all the elaborate, amazing, romantic things that you have done for other girls, but have yet to attempt such romance towards me.
You are just biding your time for the perfect moment, right? Right?

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38 comments

  1. I hate you for the ” right? right?” at the end! lmao. I hate him and I love him for you too. Its that double edged sword thing. And as much as you try, you can’t shake him. You’re throwing daggers and then ur blinking stars lol. Twinzy, ur a mess. A beautiful mess thats why i loves ya! but we gotta work on our menz


    • Twinzy…….*sigh* I know you do, and thats why I loves you. At some point the menz wont be so complicated…I just dont know when, lol!!


  2. WHAT AN AMAZING POST!!!! YOU ARE TALENTED, BEAUTIFUL AND HAVE SUCH AN EFFORTLESS SPIRIT. *HUGS*


  3. You’re lovely, hilarious, bold, and Queen of the free thinkers. Is is any wonder that it would take a man like that for you to meet your match?


    • Aww your too sweet K!! Im just good at being me and sadly me consist of saying exactly whats on my mind o.0


  4. So are you saying he’s bad for you and you want him to go away? Is he bad for you and you’ve decided to stay anyway. Or you are good with who he is and may stay awhile? Or forever?


    • thats too many damn questions CCD! lol


      • LoL Twinzy!!!!


      • What? HKS started it! I need answers dang it! Don’t start with me or I’ll come pluck your nerves on your blog 😛


    • CC,

      I am definitely good with him being him. He would likely suck at being anyone else :-/


      • Then it sounds like you are in a good place right now and that is all any of us can hope for.


      • I am in a good place sis:-) And stop lying I ain’t start nothing its YOU who is always starting shit!!! ::Tucks matches in my pocket::


      • Krissy…look for me to be tiptoeing thru your blog! I try to be nice to people but no they just gotta call me out!


      • Ur more than welcome to come to my blog. I don’t think anyone reads it except Twinzy HKS anyways but thats cuz she lovesssssss me lol


  5. HKS,
    You’s a mess….a hot beautiful mess…….but a mess none the less.


    • He he he,

      Im not a mess Twstd, Im jut misunderstood o_O Yeah thats it, LoL!! Thank you for the read babe!!!


  6. Big sis I’ma need you to pull it together…

    why cause I am on the same boat…..

    *tear*
    I love his big doo doo head


    • LMMFAO Meme, did you just say doo doo head?? Like for real dude??


  7. Just shaddap and come here. And hand over that stapler…….


    • thats it Fubs! Take control of her kinky ass!


      • Don’t encourage him twinzy, whose side you on anyway??


    • ::bends over and rubs my left ass cheek, right here babe:: 🙂


      • grabs camera


      • i think im for fubs on this one. Shut up and take it. *hands u a ball gags and waits for u to put it on*


  8. HKS…I’m laughing because I have had similar conversations with myself trying to rationalize an 8 year on-again off-again sexual relationship. Your’s, however, made me giggle.


    • Chocl8t isnt it funny. Like I am constantly going back & forth in my mind his pros vs. cons and I always find humor in the cons so I ain’t going nowhere.


      • @Chocl8t wow 8 years why can’t we shake em off??

        oh i know why… the great dick action


      • LoL I have to agree with Meme


      • At HKS & Meme, Tramps!


      • Yes,@ Meme…the dick action is on point and I can manage to stay away from his arrogant ass for 3 wks out of the month. Howeverrrrr, that week before my cycle has me hornier than a toad. Gotta scratch that itch!!! LMAO


      • Welcome back to the scene HKS! Funny post!

        I see I’m late on this but it comes down to that fantastic dick action. Even before I got to #13, I was thinking– he’s a “D.A.” (dick action)! It’s like we hold onto good dick because most guys are clueless! I know I stayed with one guy for 8 months because good lawd he was great in bed!

        LOL @ Chocl8t scratching that itch! I hear ya!


  9. @CCDreamz take one to know two!!! LoL


    • *plans ur cuddle rape*


      • yea CCD seems like she’s an undercover skeeza. Just let it out CCD just let it out!


      • yea CCD seems like shes an undercover Skeeza. Just let it out CCD, just let it out!


  10. I smiled the entire way through this post. Fantastic post, and I completely understand.


  11. SOUNDS LIKE A SCORPIO TO MEEEEE… i suffer/ enjoy because of most of these items too.



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